To the young/new/soon-to-be Mamas 

#realisticfamilyphotos

Scrolling through FB, I realize I’ve got a lot of young mom/new mom/soon-to-be mom friends – so many new precious babies!! Kind of makes me want one, but as my kids said, I don’t have a baby house inside me anymore. I digress 😉

To the point…

One thing I decided when I was caring for three babies/toddlers/preschoolers all at once (plus a teenager), is that I think we are doing it wrong as a culture. Maybe not wrong, but not as right as we could. So many of us moms are kind of lone rangers out here, trying to figure everything out for ourselves, wearing ourselves out trying to keep it all together – some by choice, some by circumstance.

Throughout the centuries kids have been raised in communities of women: mamas, aunts, grandmamas, great grandmamas, sisters, friends, neighbors. Now, a lot of us live far away from family, far away from people in the same stage of life or we isolate ourselves purposely.

If I could offer one [unsolitcited] piece of advice to young moms, it would be to take every bit of help you can get. If someone you know and trust offers help, the answer is, “Yes, thankyouverymuch.” Be careful of the pressure to be independent or to know what you’re doing. You probably won’t sometimes.

If you’ve got trustworthy, healthy family nearby and they are willing to participate, you are blessed. If not, I’d find someone to mother you in your mothering. Find some other moms and see what works for them. Don’t reinvent the wheel – learn from the successes and failures of others. Ask lots of questions and when you’re struggling, reach out to someone. 

There’s no reason to go it alone, if it’s within your grasp to do otherwise – in my humble opinion, of course. Community is just so very helpful in this wonderful, challenging, delightful, tiring, thing called motherhood.

Okay, that’s all. Carry on. You’ve probably got a diaper to change, anyway. 

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